Vent..... ;)

This blog is seriously the best way for me to vent....here goes.

1. Why must I be soooo impatient?
Case in point: I want a BABY! I don't want to wait until may, I want to do it NOW! But then I have this nagging voice in the back of my head telling me to wait. This is where it gets frustrating because I know I should wait and I know in the end I will. Sometimes I wish I could give up all attempts at being responsible and just go with what my heart is telling me to do! But, when there is a child involved this IS NOT an option. I have seriously been ready for this emotionally for such a long time. But, I know John and I have to do the right thing. I am going to graduate whether I like it or not and if God has other plans in store for me...they will happen. I dream about babies, I see PREGNANT people EVERYWHERE (One day I texted Mickey and told her that I think they are all following me!! Lol) I am frequently in tears because I don't want to wait anymore...........but I only have 3 more months to wait. We are excited and inexplicably ready to make an addition to our family.

2. School is tedious.
Is it hard....no not really. I just don't want to do the work anymore! My 5 year plan is wearing on me! I find myself in really bad moods just saying to myself "Why oh Why am I doing this crap?" Oh yeah it's because I need to if I want to make a good life for myself in the future.....

3. God is Great!
Natural Family Planning has changed mine and John's life. So many people said it wouldn't work and so many tears were shed in the days leading up to the wedding while arguing with family telling them it would all be okay. That I wouldn't get pregnant if I was preventing it and if I did it's because God had GREATER plans in store. I saw a sign the other day that said write your lifes plan in pencil and give God the eraser. It is so true. Let go and let God. John and I have been so diligent about going to church and it is like water now. I need it to survive. Communion is something I need to survive..........it is spiritual and personal in ways I never could have imagined. It makes me feel complete. I am happy to say that John and I have been pregnancy free since our wedding and NFP has worked. Not only have we been able to prevent pregnancy but we have been able to enrich our marriage. We have respect for each other and we have communication skills that exceed our expectations. Don't get me wrong....WE DEFINITLEY have our days but we work through them. We feel like we have been set free.